Stylised Monologue

Wednesday 28 September 2011

MATINEE



My friend said that this dress looks like a nighty... I suppose she's not wrong, it does a bit. In a potentially prophetic turn of events, I wore it to see a play that was extremely bad and boring. Unfortunately, as comfy as I was in my sartorial choices, the actors were shouting in my face too much to let me snooze... bad times, I tell ya!


A matinee play always confuses me as to what to wear, I always want to take advantage of the mid-afternoon outing but never want to look overdressed. (free pass into the writer's brain: I can't actually believe I'm writing this like it's a problem, it's not... yesterday, my flat flooded!!!!! Now THAT is a problem... I mean, what the hell is a fashion blogger meant to wear during a  flood?) Anyway, the answer to my ever so crucial problem is ...drumroll... a leather jacket and a pair of clogs! *sound of cheering and trumpets alongside with the visual image of confetti being thrown around* Think of them as bouncers at a very cool club, they just don't allow prepiness to get in. You could wear a Lanvin gown and still not look overdressed if you throw a leather jacket and some clogs into the equasion. Although, this might be an exaggeration plus I wouldn't advise you to wear clogs under a Lanvin gown.

Elephant in the room? What elephant in the room? That is totally me jumping!!!

dress: topshop
leather jacket: zara
clogs: topshop via eBay

Monday 26 September 2011

SNAKE/PENGUIN DRESS.

When it comes to picking out clothes, I generally try to go for things that I don't have a million of lying on my floor (I don't always succeed at this) and things that I can wear again and again and again (I don't always succeed at this one either)... Most importantly, however, I go for things coveted by the species their fabric tries to imitate. This dress, passed all the above tests with flying colours (proof in the photograph below)

[It's not very clear, but what the snake said to me was : 'Um exsssscusssse me? Where did you get your sssssssssskin from?]

what I didn't know when buying this dress (the perks of online shopping!!) was how tight it would be at it's hemline. No, seriously, it forces me to walk alarmingly similarly to a penguin (or a geisha, but lets be honest a constant geisha impression is half as funny as a Dick Van Dyke-esque penguin one... my boyfriend is a lucky man!) Hmmm... Thinking about it, this dress is so multi talented... snake and penguin, garment and comedy stimulator! Best £9 I've ever spent!



If walking in this dress is hard, imagine how hard it is to run in order to jump.  I fell over, a lot.


Take 2 (hundred) was, thankfully, more succesfull and a lot less bruise inducing! 

Friday 23 September 2011

YOU SAY YOU WANT A CONVERSATION

If you, like me, grew up believing that the key to starting and holding a conversation is intelligence, knowledge and a sense of humour, well... here I am, baring the sad news that YOU HAVE BEEN FOOLED! In reality, all we have ever needed for the task of conversation holding to be completed with success, has been fashion!! I know this is shocking and trust me, I, too, wish I had known it prior to developing an interest in writing, music and especially history! It turns out, fashion, is not just a variety of fabrics sewn together to produce beautiful, bizarre, over prised garments. I know this news must be causing you distress, but you know it makes sense. Look at it this way... say you're a socially functioning yet awkward human being in your early twenties who, despite the fact that you have a lot to talk about, might struggle to start a conversation... or if you do, it's in the awkward topics that your vicinity allows  (however, you have to be careful with this one. For example, even though discussing the ups and (mainly) downs of the weather is perfectly logical in Britain, transferring that topic to Greece will just earn you a confused look that probably won't evolve into a meaningful chat. The way to go in Greece is, moan about the taxi drivers and the government. Then again, if say, you took that topic to China you'd either be ignored or in some sort of a mess with the authorities. In fact, from my very short experience of China, I gathered that the only way to get your way with the authorities is to somehow convince them that you are very very hungry... trust me, it might even loosen the draconian safety measures taken on the night of the opening ceremony at the Olympics! True Story!) It's all very confusing...
But, fear not, I have the solution! Do a victory dance, ladies and gentlemen! No longer do we need to KNOW STUFF, READ STUFF, or even BE SOCIAL... What do you mean there is an interesting documentary on TV? A new scientific discovery? An insightful book? A brilliant article about Rommel? A play about a group of Athenian people mid Greek Civil war that not only portrays the society of the time but also has a Kim Philby twist (sorry...)?  We don't need all that anymore... All we need is Fashion! (If you want literary accuracy and a free pass into the writers mind, sing this last bit in the melody of all we need is love...[in keeping with the beatles melodies theme... hello? the title!]) All we need is a chunky block ring that will act as a white canvas ready to be painted with the interpretations of everyone you cross paths with. Never mind their age, career or closeness to you, everyone (and I mean everyone) will comment on this ring!


But a ring on it's own... not enough. You know what else gets people talking? Capes. I don't know why! I mean, they've been around for a while now... you'd think people would have gotten used to them... but no! Whilst wearing this cape, I have been asked to swish around like a bat, solve mysteries (the "clever" bunch), do a Sherlock Holmes impression (the more obvious bunch) and/or explain just how it works with the sleeves...oh... there aren't any? so... how?



(See this face? It's the face of someone who has been talked at too much! haha!)


Another way to prevent you from tiring your poor brain out with unnecessary functions like thinking and learning is LEATHER! Whether it's real, FAUX or snakeskin it's a conversation starter!! Leather, in fact, might even take it a step further and get you some lovely comments from strangers in the oddest combinations... I don't mean to put people in boxes but has a builder on the street ever commented on your shoes? Before this, I had never met one whose glance went that far south!


And now... a warning!! You've spent all that time picking the clothes, putting them together and walking around whilst wearing them. You have grabbed the attention, it's been half an hour and your sartorial preferences alone are having free rein on this conversation. You've succeeded. Brain function near zero, hurrah!!! There is one way to spoil it ....


!!! Do not jump !!!

cape: topshop (via eBay ka-ching!)
trousers: topshop (vie eBay ka-ching again)
shoes: zara (via eBay... is this getting boring? well, just one more!)
ring: cheap monday (eBay, eBay, eBay!!!) 

Monday 19 September 2011

FLATTER ME NOT.

I'm not sure what I should be blaming my current summer nostalgia on. Is it the S/S '12 happenings in London? Is it that high fashion is often a parade of unflattering garments (that I want to own, badly), is it that my body has decided to rebel against me and has come down with some strange migraine, man flu and a touch of completely undeserved hangover situation that is currently not allowing me to get out of my pyjamas and into anything worth talking/joking about? Is it all the above? *I'm nodding, to indicate that, yes, it IS all the above*
Ahh, Hello summers of the past when hair was long and cheeks were fuller and a passion for anything ethnic and hippie was ever present (ok so not EVERYTHING has changed). 
Best of all, in these old pictures, I'm bang on trend!! By some weird coincidence, or just the given fact that alike history, fashion ALSO repeats itself, floaty and white is happening in the catwalks of London RIGHT NOW!


And when it comes to unflattering and therefore oh-so-high-fashion, well... You may not be able to completely tell by the pictures, but this lovely dress manages, in one simple silhouette, to make you look simultaneously a lot wider, disproportionate and shorter than you actually are! A sartorial dream come true for any woman, I'm sure.


But really, who cares about flattering body shapes when the details are so pretty?


This ethnic necklace looks pretty happy and at home with the dress and, you know me, no ones approval matters more than the approval of ethnic jewellery. True Story.

When a boy is dressed in better shaped garments than you, you know you've nailed it fashion wise!!! (Not only is this man well dressed, he is also a brilliant photographer come on CLICK on this bold bit, it'll take you to his tumbrl and single! A real catch ladies, get him while he's hot haha!)


dress: topshop
jewellery: vintage
man: http://kafpanos.tumblr.com/

Tuesday 13 September 2011

LFW STREETSTYLE

Do you find fashion week confusing? Fret not, I'm here to help. Think the Olympic Games but with a little less lycra (well, depending on the season I suppose) and a little less obvious but probably a lot more under the surface, competition. Think the week that year after year Alexander Wang proves that he can do not wrong, the week that Helmut Lang's Nicole and Michael Colovos's perfect cuts, layers and drapes give effortless chic a new, improved meaning and Monique Lhuillier almost makes me want to sell family members for one of her gorgeous, feminine dresses. It's the week that photographers get tenonditis, models become walking canvases, designers shake in their footwear of choice, bloggers observe and fashionistas go nuts. Now, this last part, is what I need you to focus on. Ultimately, nothing influences the fashion world the way streetstyle blogs do!! The attention of the streetstyle photographer is what everyone strives for. The way to capture it? Bright palazzo pants, big sunglasses, hats, neon, multi-functional scarves, fur and high high heels. Yes, Thakoon's colour and pattern combinations were to die for and my personal favourite from this season so far, The Row, excelled with their floaty figures and almost exclusively ivory tones. However, in the long run, what everyone will talk about is how those looks have been incorporated in the lives of the fashionistas parading their stuff on the paved catwalk that is the street. And who am I to disagree?
I have been, after all, battling a hardcore adiction to certain streetstyle blogs such as a certain Mr.Newton and STREETFSN. But, if my short life experience has tought me anything, it's that if you want to make something yours, you have to relate to it. So, upon realising that, off I went, scouring the streets of London for my own, personal, streetstyle inspiration.
I looked and looked... I saw trendy girls with maxi skirts and tasled leotards walk the streets of east london, young professionals dressed to impress (with a twist) in the north, a frenzy of super stylish japanese people in central london (is good style genetic in japan?), some prim and propper chanel wearing ladies in the west and... well... well... THEN I spotted my streetstyle inspiration! A loved up, stylish, coulour clashing and very very British couple. They didn't care much for Fashion week, they had their own style. A style, they happily allowed me to get inspired from.   


Want to see a picture of them? yes?
...
...
...
well then,


Say hello to rubbish bin and fish and chips box!!!


Streetstyle inspiration mission: ACCOMPLISHED!!




HAPPY FASHIONWEEEEEEEEEEEEEEK LONDON! LETS ALL JUMP FOR JOY!!!!



trousers: asos
top: topshop
blazer: topshop
jewellery: vintage
sun glasses: ray ban

Thursday 8 September 2011

OH SUMMER...

Such nostalgia for the season I hardly experienced this year...



photo by the beautiful konstantina. 

Monday 5 September 2011

THE LWUHD.

The Little Black Dress has had free reign in the fashion world since the day a lady named after chocolate beans deemed it the chicest, most elegant, most essential garment  in a woman's wardrobe. Yes, yes, it can be dressed down, it can be dressed up, it is the fashion staple equivalent of salt and pepper... that is all true. Now, I don't mean to doubt the legend that is Madame Coco, (my name, at the end of the day, means bay leaf, an admittedly far lesser spice.) but here's my argument... the LBD is boring. Unless you shot a man in Reno just to watch him die, try not to look like you're going to a funeral every single time a dress-up opportunity arises. (take notice... I didn't say never, I wouldn't dare challenge girlfriend's (coco) ghost in that way, I merely said not every single (insert word stating my exasperation, preferably starting with an F, although really it's up to whatever level of political correctness suits you) time!) What do I have to counter suggest? Well... as it happens, I was walking through a welsh forest in my ethereal LWUHD (as you do!) when someone (Anthony) snapped my picture by coincidence (completely planned in order to show and not just tell...screenwriting you will forever haunt my brain won't you?!!!!!! insert angry emoticon) Now, before I proceed to show you the pictures (no you can't just voluntarily scroll down/see the pictures anyway... play along damnit!) you have to guess what LWUHD stands for... guess! guess! guess! guess! Ok, fine I'll tell you... it's a Little White Uneven Hemline Dress. Ta-daaaaaaaa. Easy, peasy!


(just look at these pictures... This blog is mainly about realism!!) Now, the LWUHD is not only comfy, pretty and different it's also in it's way, rather multi talented. Case in point:
It looks great when you twirl in it...
it's fantastic for any last minute virgin Mary impersonations 


It can be worn either in it's original form, or Kim Kardashian-ed up! 
and of course, for the most important activity of the day,  when you jump, it'll make you look less like a bat/witch/flying olive[lack of imagination right there, happens to the best of us!] and more like a (deranged/mentally retarded) angel
(....ok, well, the compulsory tongue sticking out whilst jumping, cannot, unfortunately, be prevented by any garment no matter how many sartorial J.Lo style abbreviations you can come up with... )
So now you know, ladies and gents (what? I don't judge!) next time you're invited to a party/date/gig/dinner/christening/etc... ditch the LBD and take up the LWUHD... Bay Leaf Economou is writing fashion history right here, don't say I didn't tell you so!! 

LWUHD: cheap monday
Boots: asos
necklaces: vintage.

Friday 2 September 2011

OH HIIII LIFE...

Oh hiiii life...
I had forgotten how to have you, it's been so long.
Brunch? What? You mean I can leave the house?


mmmmm.... wow... oh, no I've waisted too long eating I need to go back to work. oh wait, NO I DON'T! I can go pick some noses instead


(notice the statue... an avid Stylised Dialogue reader??? I think so! Has he or has he not taken cue from a certain Mick Jagger impersonation? What do you think? click click click on the bold bit)

I can also go see some amazing photography by Corinne Day (R.I.P) - so brilliant!! Fashion lover or not, if you're in London I would strongly advise you to make your way to the Gimple Fils gallery in Mayfair and appreciate some great art. Oh and it's free, so really you have no excuse to miss it! (yeah, throwing some culture in is necessary after the nose picking haha!)




I know, I know, Kate's got nothing on me poor thing!



and then, and theeeeennnnnn... I'm going to go home due to feeling like death. Turns out my first day of freedom is spent with soup, fluids, friends (not my actual friends, the ones with full stops between every letter. f.r.i.e.n.d.s, the tv show), nurse Anthony (yay!) and A HIGH FEVER.
Thanks life... this is how you welcome me back?? pshhh...